#the man is just too catholic sorry
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Catholicism.
[.... oops I accidentally wrote real analysis in the tags lol]
why is he like this
#les mis#original#the man is just too catholic sorry#poor guy#it's a REALLLLY sad ending if you're an atheist#at least if you believe in God then like. obviously he's going to heaven but if you don't it's like.#OH FOR FUCKS SAKE JEAN [uncontrollable weeping]#he got a new lease on life but that lease said 'you need to at the very least symbolically crucify yourself'.#and he combined that with the self-hatred and isolation that comes with being an ex-con in a society that hates convicts#and so by the time everything is settled and he has nothing else to sacrifice but himself he simply#kills himself in cosette's name and to cosette's utter horror and grief. because if no one NEEDS him then all he knows is self-sacrifice so#it becomes a rather chilling tragedy of what happens when a man is determined to engage in self-sacrifice even when it's not needed#this probably was not Hugo's intention. but to me it's about when self-sacrifice becomes self-harm and that is#the ultimate tragedy of Jean Valjean that I missed when I read it at 15. back when i too believed what my catholic upbringing had taught me.#like I became an atheist at age 11 but the idea that the only way to be a truly good person is to place literally everyone in the world#before myself even if they don't want me to .... I'm still trying to outgrow that at age 30.#and I did not become aware of it being an issue until like my mid-20s.#it wasn't until the past couple years I could actually articulate why the end of les mis was so upsetting to me.#probably bc to me at age 15 it was confirmation that the best thing i could do for the world was to die for it.#when really now what i see is cosette's grief and the utter lack of necessity in Jean's sacrifice and i think how much more beautiful it is#to instead LIVE for one another. because unnecessary self-sacrificial death is just suicide. jean commits suicide bc his belief system#and his trauma and his oppression make it impossible for him to see saving his own life as a moral good.#oh no I've written an actual answer dammit this was meant to be a silly haha post but yeah Catholicism saved him until it damned him#womp womp [uncontrollable sobbing]
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cast out of paradise
#please see my vision here#PLEASE#sorry for injecting my catholic trauma into the silly superhero show guys I can���t help it#the fallen angel#invincible#invincible show#invincible fanart#omni man#omniman#nolan grayson#mark grayson#debbie grayson#crismakesstuff#the original painting ‘the fallen angel’ is just SO HIM#the grief the despair and anger about his own choices#ITS NOLAN!#ok but if you guys let me ramble if I had to assign biblical roles to the graysons#i can see nolan as god himself (or lucifer but more so god tbh) debbie is mother mary and mark is jesus#the whole ‘lamb of god’ motif just fits mark wayyyy too well#also I saw someone make art of debbie and mark as ‘la pietà’ and I’ve been a changed person since#AGAIN SORRY FOR THROWING CATHOLIC IMAGERY AT THE SUPERHERO SHOW#this is how my brain wants to cope w it ig ;-;#catholic imagery
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i wish i couldve done more with daisy, shes very fun to me. i ❤️ gay but homophobic characters and daisy just didnt get a chance to shine as much as she does in my head
#racing!#when ur a girl in love with ur best friend but ur bedt friend is Also a girl and u were raised catholic#daisy Did like june. like a Lot. she just didnt know how to cope with it#if i couldve done split perspective ..... god#if i had the Room to do split perspective in one book for capstone i wouldve been so fuckibg strong. alas#idk if ill ever do a book for daisy but man the idea is tempting#i put too much of myself in june and it made me hate her a lot..... lol...... sorry june .....#my favorite character to ddaw was Not u.......and my fav character to write or think about is extremely not u........
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leon being italian and luis being spanish like ....those are the two most likely and unlikely white euopean people to pair together, it makes them perfect.
who is more catholic out of the two? the only correct answer is luis, whereas leon is an agnostic ex catholic lmao
#now that i know leon is italian i need him to tan just like luis - they are both that kinda white#he has the capability too#can leon speak italian??#i doubt it#but if he can#that means he can actually understand spanish#and i specifically mean the european dialect that luis would speak#sorry but leon being italian and luis being Spanish does not help by European history hyperfixation#but tbh my leon is white passing his dad was the italian one is mom is not#if they find someone who is Portuguese they have the whole trio of catholics or colonizers pick your poison#i am just kidding i love these two#serrenedy#luis serra#leon s kennedy#they are going into my white boy category that i do nawt play about#like what do you mean leon isn't some normal white man from the midwest#what do you mean he's like luis#???#but ntm on them my boys aren't racist#in my personal hc#leon is actually not fully white he's like white passing#luis is the white one#but i digress
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i'm putting this under the cut simply so i don’t jumpscare myself when looking through my blog. i'm talking about claire and sex.
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the first time claire and hunt have sex she cries for half an hour afterwards because 1. for the first time sex feels truly consensual + something enjoyable and she doesn’t feel like an object. and 2. it’s with him that she feels like this + it is still rather shameful to her that she feels attracted to him. conflicting experience.
sex is important to claire’s character and i’ve never really talked about it in length because um well i don’t want to be crass, and i don’t want to remove weight from it.
when i refer to claire’s relationships i am mostly referring to sexual relationships because that’s what they were. and that’s why she feels she lacks worth. well, this complex exists since childhood but these relationships feed into it. claire is used and exploited, and she has been her entire life. in multiple meanings of the word. this is very connected to her theme of agency (it’s all one big thing). and sex is self destructive behaviour to her. hence all these situations she finds herself in. it’s a cycle.
which leads to: i don’t think claire knows how to deal when attraction and sex and desire are in positive contexts (please do notice that as soon as she realises she's attracted to hunt in on the hunt she blurts out about being abused by her therapist). and especially when it’s something that has proven to be destructive many times turns out to be positive. at least, she feels like it’s positive this time. what should she feel? in short claire’s relationship to sex (and sexuality in general) is… multifaceted. complex. i’ve mentioned it before and i’m not going to elaborate it further here, but both claire and hunt feel shame and guilt for their relationship, for different reasons. but i think it’s important for them, individually. there’s just like. this subject neither of them wants to touch upon because it’s shameful. and at the same time it’s attractive to them.
i had originally written a lot more here about it but i don’t think it’s good enough. lmao. and i don’t want to post something written without the merit it deserves. but i do think it’s good characterisation that claire can only talk about whatever goes on with her after sex. it's punishment and it's also catharsis. it's just really blurry to her. as it often is. would like to talk more about this i just like to be deliberate about it.
#oc: claire swanson#huntclaire#actually there’s such a good point about hunt here. when claire tells him about all that stuff. do you think he feels guilty? do you think#he wonders if he’s just another man taking advantage of her? do you think he is? does claire think he is?#i don’t think he’s ill intentioned. i don’t think claire thinks he’s ill intentioned. i don’t think claire would’ve ever dated him if things#had been different to her. love them dearly but those are two people that shouldn’t be together lmao#and also. i like how he is somewhat aware of this. since in canon it is said he grades mc more harshly#this is overcompensation! he feels guilty! he feels shame. it’s good.#i think it took me too long to talk about this. it’s okay red heart emoji#<- anyway this is not too say i think they don’t love each other and they’re in a relationship because they have a weird psychosexual thing#going on. quite the contrary. i think claire loves hunt very much. and he loves her too. and that scares claire deeply!#he loves her and that’s frightening.#this all feels so catholic i think it should be. on purpose.#<- actually. when i said it’s good they both feel ashamed and guilty. it’s so they can have sex about it. that’s how we’re fixing things#sorry that’s literally what happens?#that’s their entire bit!!
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Kamen Rider Geats episode 31 poorly summarized via memes with as little context as possible:
#kamen rider geats#kamen rider geats poorly summarized#kamen rider geats ep 31#hello hello im back on my bs#and can i just say i have ZERO clue how theyre resolving this arc#really no damn idea#also tho the catholic jokes write themselves this episode#heaven? hell? a god who judges on arbitrary will unknown to us?#sorry did i miss geats and somehow end up back in sunday school?#also a man sacrifices his flesh for his son too#“this is my body eat of it and you shall live”#anyways#also surprised how they revealed info vital to both ace and keiwa this ep#wasnt expecting there to be such a clinical reason behind the death of his parents tbh#also poor keiwa#he was relevant to the plot but at what cost AT WHAT COST#still have no idea what they plan on doing w buffa#we gonna bring up that turning into a jyamato thing or...?
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honestly one of the roughest nights ive had at work in a while on paper like. bad
#i dont FEEL super bad so it doesnt feel it#and it wasnt busy so luckily we were able to cope#but man it was. bad#had a rare super rude customer interaction#and i almost fell for a phone scam which i still feel guilty for even tho i caught myself in time#im too tired and autistic to deal with bold liars making 70% sense okay im sorry#i feel so fucking guilty i feel like i need to confess to my manager when i see him tomorrow#but i like him and dont want him to be disappointed in me#catholic ass impulse#anyway like half the people who were supposed to be there just didnt show up god
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Alright, look, I get it. Funny haha joke, Star Wars vs. Star Trek.
But here's the thing: Star Wars isn't sci-fi. It's fantasy, set in space. There is a difference.
Sci-fi, or Science Fiction, tends to focus on a specific phenomenon, technology, or advancement, such as space travel, gene mutation, the existence and usage of true AI, whether or not androids are considered "human."
Fantasy... does not. It is more focused on the story, and tends to include things like swords and sorcery, princes and princesses, evil warlords, corrupt regimes, et cetera.
Fantasy and sci-fi are often combined in some way, which is why "fantasy/sci-fi" is a common genre or subgenre. In fact, three of my favorite series, The Darksword Trilogy, The Deathgate Cycle, and The Star of the Guardians (Darksword and Deathgate written by Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman, Star of the Guardians written by Margaret Weis) are solidly fantasy/sci-fi, or sci-fi/fantasy in the case of Darksword and SotG. In fact, pure fantasy and pure sci-fi are rare, and even the fantasy series Wheel of Time (Robert Jordan, finished by Brandon Sanderson) could easily be classified as sci-fi without much effort.
As far as pure sci-fi goes, I think The Expanse (the show, never read the books) and Mag Force Seven (Margaret Weis and Don Perrin) are probably the closest I've seen, even though MF7 is set in the same universe as SotG, and contains some fantasy elements. Pokemon could also be considered sci-fi, if you think of the Poke Ball as the advancement in question, or the mons themselves as phenomena.
For fantasy, Lord of the Rings (J.R.R. Tolkien, of course) may well be the only pure fantasy books I've ever read, because even books like Septimus Heap (Angie Sage) have a lot of tech in them, even in the first book. For video games, Zelda comes to mind, specifically Ocarina of Time, for pure fantasy.
Which one of those sounds more like Star Wars to you? Does Star Wars have a focus on a specific piece of technology, advancement, or phenomenon that drives the plot/themes, or does Star Wars have a focus swords, sorcery, a princess, an evil warlord, and a corrupt regime?
Star Wars is sometimes referred to as a "space opera," which may or may not be true, I don't know because I don't really know anything about operas. But it's definitely not sci-fi.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
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pretty much the only good thing about the paper of record anymore, the crossword
#this is all off the top of my head btw so apologies for any errors#but hey if you're reading this go read SotG! Catholic Star Wars my beloved#funny-ass book series with canon textual homosexual monsterfucker Raoul#MF7 too even though Don Perrin lends a certain straight man-ness to the book and has a TiM.#but this is set in the future with weird strange catholic magic so I'm sure they have the technology or something#they should have let Rowan be a gay GNC man tho. smh my head he and Raoul could have been besties#anyway um yeah.#source: i wrote/am writing a 700-page 200k word Star Wars fic and have researched a bunch of Star Wars stuff#(mainly saber forms and Force powers but those aren't sci-fi either lol)#you could argue the Tython saga as sci-fi what with the Tho Yor but I still don't. look up Force-imbued blades and get back to me#source 2: my sister who gave me/let me read the Margaret Weis books and has been reading fantasy books since before I was born#also. Star Wars is basically George Lucas' annotated copy of The Hero's Journey. so#sorry it just ticks me off when people categorize Star Wars as sci-fi bc it's in space. shallow-ass take tbh#go read a book/series written for your age demographic and get back to me when you can discuss complex themes like this#spesus sprist (space jesus space christ)
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astarion... the man that you are.....
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#morning ^_^ !!! on a roadtrip rn w family so i am well <3 even if it is just turning 8 am <33#i am a morning person as much as i am a night owl actually ... before the pandemic i used to wake early even w/o an alarm on non school days#and i wake early less nowadays but i love when i get up early and i wish i could do so more but i hate sleeping too early lol#ANYWAY HI i hope you all are well. unfortunately now that i'm online again you all will be subjected to my random rambles.#not as bad on my priv twt where i talk about philosophical topics and the like an overwhelmingly amount but aha that is Fine !!!!!#i want to change my theme. i love you themis. but. aghghhhh to what... to what...#i wna practice graphic designing a bit bcs i suck (<- amazed at the abilities of my peers and out of practice at all)#errr i want to reference. mäneskin maybe (in the time i have been gone i have gotten obsessed w a new band <3 how very apollo of me. anyway)#'all is fair in love' ... ? 'valentine my decline is so much better with you' ..... ?#idk man. and what color scheme! and who!!!#vincent valentine is a choice esp bcs of ffviir. aerith is wnother just because i adore her so much. uhhh#zenos... because we are insane..... and thten i forgot every other single character. oops!#i am a nerd so i want something space themed this time actually. insert a bit of physics (physics nerd ^_^)#have i bragged (/lh) about how i'm the only person i know in my batch at my school who got perfect in the first physics exam#and that all my classmates and friends like gojng to me and call me 'sister (irl)' bcs i am in a catholic school#:3 i love physics ... man. makes me remember how much i love math And science. even if i do hate molecular bio sorry some of it is interesti#but GOD i hate learning about dna in school. just dna. everything else is literally okay i literally have on the origin of species i got it#for my bday i asked my friends to buy me it bcs they offered. fucking insane#yeah so (<- haha nerd) anyway i also grew up w bill nye my fav guy and sid the science kid and god little einstein was my favorite show#despite me probably watching a total of 5 episodes compared to others. oh my god.#and the way i would get . if i got anymore than 3 mistakes in a math exam my whole life i would have to hold back tears LMFAOOO oh god.#smh i swear if history class wasn't in filipino for my whole life before highschool i would have goddamn excelled#i still did but ... !!! only filipino subjects brought me down. tho i do love learning abt my language even if it also pisses me off ^_^#right where was i haha RIGHT ..... okay. ok. uhh i want an ff character ............ actually ff8 would be slay#or urianger. space fits too. astrologist man. and then i forgot everyone else. oops!#aha............ crystal exarch. but specifically the crystal exarch. or i'll just do mr squall leonhart or vincent valentine#space!!! my beloved... you can wait another time... i wish to reference the hit song valentine by mäneskin
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𝙊𝙃, 𝙁𝘼𝙏𝙃𝙀𝙍 𝙄 𝙃𝘼𝙑𝙀 𝙎𝙄𝙉𝙉𝙀𝘿 𝙄 | 𝙁𝘼𝙏𝙃𝙀𝙍 𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙍𝙇𝙄𝙀
a/n: i haven't started the show yet, so I'm not familiar with his character in this show. please forgive my cluelessness during this fic.
summary: the reader goes to the church to confess to the priest that she recently sinned. however, the father decides to have some fun of his own.
warnings: mention of religion, 18+, missionary, loss of virginity, oral(fem & m receiving) fingering, nipple play, praise kink, pet names like doll,sweetheart,baby, mentions of anal, spanking, degrading, corruption kink, almost caught
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growing up in a religious household, i have developed a deep appreciation for my catholic roots. whenever I feel overwhelmed by sadness, anger, or depression, I find solace in the church.
today i couldn't help but feel a tremendous amount of guilt. i found myself hanging out with a boy, and things got a bit physical. even though we didn't go too far, i couldn't help but feel ashamed. i had promised to wait until marriage, but these uncontrollable desires keep creeping up. i've decided to go to the church to talk to the father about my recent activities and confess my sins.
as i made my way to the church, i felt a mix of nervousness and anticipation. i'm meeting with father charlie, a young and attractive man who’s also the priest at the church, which is not something you typically expect in the church. i haven't had a chance to speak with him one-on-one yet, so im feeling a bit apprehensive about what our conversation will entail.
i open the big doors to the church to see it completely empty just to find charlie sitting down on one the church benches.
“hello there” he calls out.
"father, there's something weighing heavily on my heart that I need to share with you," i said as I hurried to sit next to him.
i can feel that irritating uneasy sensation in my stomach. I didn't even give him a proper greeting. the guilt was so overwhelming that it made me stumble over my words.
"what is it y/n?" he turns all of his attention towards me, his big brown eyes digging into mine, as if anticipating something significant.
“i don’t know who to talk to, i can’t talk to my parents about this especially my own father. i’ve been feeling really guil-“
he interrupted me with a gentle smile and placed his hand on my shoulder, assuring me that everything would be okay and letting me know that he was a safe person to talk to.
“father, i need to confess something. i kissed a boy, and he kissed me back. he started to touch me, but i stopped him. i made a promise to the lord, and i feel terrible for breaking it”
as the tears welled up in my eyes, i instinctively dropped my face into my hands, seeking refuge from the overwhelming emotions.
"hey, it's going to be okay," charlie said in a gentle, caring tone as he stroked my hair, trying to comfort me.
“now tell me, did you guys fuck?”
as those words reached my ears, i couldn't help but look up at him, shaking my head as the tears continued to fall.
oh no, i hope he's not going to make me feel even worse.
“no father i swear-“
"shh, no swearing in the church," he said, raising his finger to his lips with a smirk. the irony wasn't lost on him, considering he had just dropped the f-bomb.
it was so quiet for a whole minute, and I started feeling really awkward. i had come all this way hoping for some advice or comfort, but it seemed like he just didn't care.
as I stood up, charlie grabbed my arm, forcing me to sit back down. “i didn't say you could leave. where do you think you're going?”
he replied coldly, smirking, “always so forgiving. it's kind of pathetic”
i stared at him, utterly perplexed, not really sure what he was talking about.
“father, isn't forgiveness what the church is all about?”
“sometimes, but in this case, i really want you to show me how sorry you are. otherwise, you're just going to keep committing the same sin over and over again. you don't want that, right? you don't want your parents to find out how desperate their innocent little girl has become, do you?"
i couldn't believe what i was hearing from charlie. i never expected him to act this way, let alone say things like this. i was at a loss for words and didn't know how to react. all i could do was nod in agreement. the last thing i wanted was for my parents to find out.
“father, i think i should go”
"why are you suddenly so shy, doll?" his hand on my chin made me tilt my head to stare at him.
"you don't think i notice how you look at me during mass when I'm speaking on the stand? you've become so needy that you sometimes cross your legs to stop yourself from feeling those emotions you want to avoid so badly," he says while caressing my cheek, gently rubbing his thumb on my bottom lip.
"i know you think of me taking you to the point where you can't even think straight, cum dripping out of you while i use you for my pleasure. you don't think i notice that? the way you avoid eye contact with me”
“i don’t know what your talking about father”
charlie’s hand rested lightly on my thigh, sending a spark of electricity coursing through my body. as his fingers inched toward the top of my skirt, pushing the fabric up just a little, my breath caught in my throat. each slow movement seemed to stretch time, heightening my senses and igniting a thrilling tension i couldn't ignore.
it felt deceptively wrong—the kind of reckless abandon that sent a shiver down my spine—but the anticipation was intoxicating, and I craved more. my mind raced, caught between instinct and hesitation, as the warmth of his touch settled into a deep hunger, one i found increasingly impossible to resist.
i glanced up, searching his eyes for a sign, a cue that this was more than just a fleeting moment. we held a playful challenge, a promise of the passion we both knew was simmering beneath the surface. my heart raced with excitement and fear, the boundaries of right and wrong blurring into a sweet confusion. with every breath, i felt the world around us fade away, lost to the undeniable chemistry pulsing in the air. i didn’t want to stop it; I wanted to let go completely and dive headfirst into whatever was coming next.
“do you want this as much as I want this?" charlie's voice broke through the haze of my thoughts, causing my heart to race in an unholy rhythm. i felt his gaze resettle upon me, a weight both thrilling and terrifying. my mind was a jumble, each beat vying for clarity as i struggled to focus on anything but him.
his eyes—the deep pools of mischief and longing—held me captive, swaying me like a fragile leaf in a rising storm. the blueprint of his desires flickered behind those intense brown eyes, and my cheeks burned with a shameful blush. I could hear the hymns of the service fade into background noise, a distant echo that paled against the ferocity of this moment.
what was wrong with me? i shouldn’t be feeling this way, not here—certainly not in a house of worship. my skirt brushed against my legs, reminding me of the innocence i used to wear like armor, now discarded in the face of this ravenous yearning. charlie wanted me. craved me. it was a dangerous temptation that had taken root within me, whispering sweet nothings that urged me to give in.
the candlelit corners of the church bathed in shadows, the lure was overwhelming. each passing week at mass had been an exercise in restraint, a careful balancing act over a precipice of emotion. seeing him near the altar in his crisp shirt—as though god himself had stitched him together purely for me���seemed more sublimely wrong every time.
as his eyes swept over me, i wondered if he could sense the tension glittering between us, thick and electrifying like charged air before a storm. j licked my lips, torn between the sanctity of the aisle and the allure of his promise. "I need you, doll. I can't deny it anymore," he murmured like a sin freshly minted from temptation's forge.
i felt a tumultuous wave of conflicting emotions surging within me. the whispered prayers seemed empty as an overwhelming desire ignited like an uncontrollable inferno. "father” i gasped, but the air escaped me, filled with forbidden possibilities. despite everything, all i could focus on were his lips drawing nearer to mine, as if the world around us faded away, leaving only the intense magnetism between us.
in that sacred moment, beneath the flickering lights, surrounded by silence begging to be heard, we hovered on the brink of something vast and insatiable. would we give in? would grace curdle into passion? ignoring the whisper of consequence felt like my true struggle—should we tiptoe across this brittle line, or confess that hunger has only one unyielding answer? together.
as I processed what was happening, a surge of warmth enveloped me, and i found myself surrendering to the moment. his lips danced across the sensitive skin of my neck, light as a whisper but charging the air with electricity. a small moan escaped my lips, betraying the whirlwind of emotions stirring within me. i could feel his smirk, a secret shared just between us, brushing against my skin, simultaneously teasing and thrilling.
his hand roamed over my thigh, a firm yet gentle grip that sent a shiver cascading through my body. "that's it, such a good girl for me," he purred, his voice a low whisper that thrummed like a melody in my ears, both lustful and tender. each word dripped with a promise, igniting the fire kindling deep within me, blurring the boundaries between desire and surrender.
lost in this intoxicating closeness, i reveled in the sensations; the world beyond shifted and faded, leaving only his teasing caresses and the seductive intimacy that enveloped us—a balance of power and vulnerability, inviting me to cross the threshold into unknown territory.
"father, i really don’t think we should be doing this here. It just doesn’t feel right. what if we get caught?" i watched as charlie sighed, rubbing his forehead in frustration, clearly torn between desire and caution.
"you’re right," he replied, his voice low and raspy, "but it’s late, and I don’t think anyone’s going to wander into the church at this hour. just relax, sweetheart."
i hesitated for a moment, then nodded, the thrill of the forbidden sending a shiver down my spine. i reached out, intertwining my fingers with his, bringing his hand to my lips and sucking gently on his long fingers. his eyes locked onto mine, filled with a primal hunger that made my heart race. i could see it in his expression—the desperate need to claim me, to tear away any barrier between us.
the air was thick with anticipation, and i could almost feel the weight of his longing as he shifted closer, his breath coming in quick, shallow bursts. the dim light from the stained glass windows cast a soft glow around us, amplifying the intensity of the moment. i could sense the tension building, a thrilling mix of danger and desire, as he leaned in, caught in the magnetic pull that seemed to draw us together like moths to a flame.
we were on the edge of something wild and reckless, and in that sacred space, everything felt possible.
charlie withdrew his fingers, his intention clear as he replaced them with his warm, teasing tongue. it slipped into my mouth, exploring with a fervor that sent electric shivers through my entire body. he held my neck gently yet possessively, urging me closer, deeper, igniting a fire that burned between us.
i kissed him back with equal intensity, a thrilling battle for dominance that left us both breathless. the taste of him was intoxicating, a heady mixture of desire and urgency that made my heart race. every flick of his tongue ignited a wave of pleasure, pooling low in my belly and making it almost impossible to think straight.
the heat of the moment consumed me; i could feel my body responding instinctively to his every move. the sweet tension built inside me, and i knew i needed him—needed to feel him against me, to drown in that wild connection we shared. my panties were already soaked, a testament to the overwhelming desire coursing through my veins.
charlie pushes my panties to the side allowing his already wet fingers from my saliva to dance around my clothed heat growling like a predator hungry for its prey “let me show you how a real man is supposed to make you feel darling, those little boys wouldn’t know how to handle something so precious like you. i can make you feel so good you wouldn’t be able to walk straight for days”
as he pumps his fingers in out of me the sweet sounds filling up the quiet church was enough for the both of us to go crazy “more father please” he smirked at my neediness removing his fingers out of me putting them up to mouth to signaling me to suck the sweet juices off of his fingers then going back in for a quick rub of my clit
charlie stood up getting ready to unbuckle his pants but before he could even do that a voice filled up the quiet room which caused me to jump and act quick closing my legs and hiding my exposed area “father charlie i’ve been looking everywhere for you” an older lady shouts from across the room as she appears to be in desperate need of his help
he sighed and i took that as my sign to leave before we both do something we might regret later, charlie keeps his gaze on me the entire time “hi, ill be with you in a moment” he spoke up the lady stops in her tracks wondering what a young woman was doing here at almost midnight with the priest of the church she was curious but nothing crossed her mind as she was desperate to talk to the priest
charlie followed me out of the church closing the door behind us “this isn’t over sweetheart” he placed a kiss on my forehead as he walked back into the church.
˖⋆࿐໋
a/n: omggg i hope you guys like this!! i’ve spent almost a day and a half working on this just for you all especially the person who requested this, i will be making this into a little series since it was getting pretty long! anyways i really hope you guys enjoyed this, remember feel free to request anything!
#nicholas chavez smut#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez imagine
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nonsense... or is it? | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem singer!reader
face claim: sabrina carpenter
based on this request: sooo, anyways,,, i was thinking maybe a smau where Charles is playing the guy who Milo was and this obviously breaks the internet even more and this leads to them dating ??? idk, just like a really wholesome one where she was his celebrity crush and now they're dating bc of them getting know each other more bc of the music video. sorry if this is all over the place but yeah. - @whoreks
MASTERLIST | BUY ME A KO-FI?
yourusername
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liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,200,441 others
yourusername: holla babes !!! the feather music video is heading your way fast xxx if only my real boyfriends were like my music videos ones ...
view all comments
user1: MOTHER
user2: finally music videos are back baby !!
taylorswift: you can still make the whole place shimmer ✨
yourusername: thanks to you baby
user3: oh to be able to call taylor swift baby
user4: y/n's shade is so underrated - i too wish her boyfriends were as good as her mv ones
user5: she's got such a good eye for casting why can't she do this in her actual love life
user6: okay but he's hot based off a single shoulder i'm excited
user7: you got that from a SHOULDER?
user8: he's TALL?
user9: babe y/n is like 4'2 she makes everyone look tall
user10: say what you want about the catholic church, they got the aesthetic down pat
yourbff1: so we aren't asking the mv boyf out? boring.
yourusername: we have lil things called phones? USE IT HOE
user11: charles leclerc in the likes
user12: so true of him
user13: unless he's... the guy
user14: babe he's way too short lol
user15: have yall seen the sky ad? baby aint acting any time soon
yourusername
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liked by yourbff1, charles_leclerc and 1,763,550 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: OMG you guys blew the feather music video up !! i'm sure it had nothing to do with this random guy i found off the street? jokes, thank you charles for being the perf mv boyf xx
view all comments
user17: HOLY FUCKING SHIT
user18: celeb crush inception no one touch me
charles_leclerc: thank you for my music video debut, maybe you can return the favour one day?
yourusername: i'll return any favour you want
yourbff1: dial down the desperation babe
charles_leclerc: what if i want her to dial it up please?
yourbff1: do NOT encourage her
yourusername: please encourage me :)
user19: Y/N STAND UP PLEASE
user20: actually y/n is so real have yall seen that man YUM
liked by yourusername
user21: y/n is a genius for fancasting her future bf in her music video
danielricciardo: THIS IS HOW I FIND OUT? SHARL WHEN I CATCH YOU
pierregasly: and me :( i thought our friendship meant more ....
charles_leclerc: it was a secret
yourusername: he doesn't kiss and tell xoxo
alexalbon: WHAT ??????
charles_leclerc: okay we can stop joking now
yourusername: fine...
user22: the way charles was defo typing that through tears
user23: y/n make the move we believe in you
user24: believe in her? she can get anyone she wants he's gotta STEP UP
charles_leclerc
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liked by landonorris, yourusername and 2,099,441 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: had a blast filming for my first ever music video, thank you y/n !!
view all comments
user25: i'm feeling a new unhealthy attachment forming
yourusername: feel free to come back any time soon
charles_leclerc: or maybe you can come to me?
yourusername: is this my paddock debut?
charles_leclerc: make sure you're wearing red and it sure can be
yourusername: let me check the wardrobe
user26: i will pass away if we get y/n at a race... in the ferrari garage ???
pierregasly: let it be known i am still angry that you didn't tell me, especially after all the weird rants i've listened to
alexalbon: me too
georgerussell63: me too
landonorris: me too
danielricciardo: me too
carlossainz55: me too
maxverstappen1: me too
charles_leclerc: why is max here?
maxverstappen1: that's what you're taking from this?
charles_leclerc: yeah why are you in my business
maxverstappen1: you make it my business you talk about her all the time
yourusername: oh really ???
charles_leclerc: HE'S A BIG FAT LIAR HE'S ALWAYS BEEN A BIG FAT LIAR ALL HIS LIFE INCLUDING WHEN I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY PUSHED HIM IN A PUDDLE
maxverstappen1: YOU DID PUSH ME IN THAT PUDDLE
yourusername: what is going on here?
user27: poor y/n being thrown into the grid drama
user28: poor charles with the grid trying to expose him
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,334,661 others
yourusername: clearly was feeling myself this week
view all comments
user31: lol why is max here
maxverstappen1: doing my due diligence as an investigative journalist
charles_leclerc: choke.
user32: is that charles? are we in the soft launch?
user33: let's not get ahead of ourselves, we know charles doesn't dress that well
user34: consider this: girlfriend effect
user35: girlfriend effect is gonna have to do some heavy lifting when it comes to charles' wardrobe
yourbff1: you think you're so slick don't you
yourusername: maybe. maybe not?
yourbff1: you're so annoying
yourusername: annoyingly cute?
liked by charles_leclerc
yourbff1: keep your nose out of women's business leclerc
charles_leclerc: SLANDER
user36: i mean they seem to have the same sense of humour
user37: not to sound insane but they are perfect for each other and i will be passing away if they are not together
pierregasly: interesting
danielricciardo: add it to the folder
charles_leclerc: folder ???
maxverstappen1: leave us journalists be
charles_leclerc: can you even read?
yourusername: GET HER JADE
maxverstappen1: add that as well
charles_leclerc: why can't we win?
user38: what is going on in the house of commons
charles_leclerc
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liked by pierregasly, yourusername and 2,331,663 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: i don't believe in soft launches
view all comments
user39: we been knew... but OMG PARENTS
user40: i am crying they're so hot
yourusername: hawt bf obtained
charles_leclerc: sexy gf in my inventory
yourusername: you're such a cute patootie
charles_leclerc: i cannot speak my mind or instagram will censor me
yourusername: ...oop hurry up and come back :(
charles_leclerc: about to break all US speeding laws xoxo
yourusername: not you in your charli xcx era
user41: he's with her ... in the US ... could we get y/n paddock debut in vegas ???
user42: would only be right i fear
user43: the scheduling just about makes sense before she has to go back to opening for taylor in south america
user44: now why did vegas not get in their bag and get y/n to perform at the opening ceremony?
pierregasly: way to ruin the investigation
danielricciardo: yeah we were in our sherlock holmes era
maxverstappen1: have to spoil everything don't you charles 🤨
charles_leclerc: i thought you guys wanted to know who my girlfriend is?
alexalbon: yes, but we wanted to expose it :(
yourusername: CORNY
pierregasly: oh no. he has someone on his side now
yourusername: damn right frenchie. i can hear your asshole twitching from here
pierregasly: WHAT ???
charles_leclerc: idk what that means but YEAH PIERRE TAKE THAT
charles_leclerc
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liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 2,114,762 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: gutted not to be on the top step but an overall great weekend in vegas. glad to have y/n by my side this weekend before she's off again to slay the stage xx
view all comments
user48: charles unironically using the word slay, the girlfriend effect knows no bounds
user49: the sky camera zooming in on y/n watching the podium
user50: i think we watched her fall in love in real time
user51: i mean look at the material... podium charles hits so different i think I FELL IN LOVE
yourusername: you're a winner to me babe
charles_leclerc: and that's all that matters
yourusername: NOPE STAY HUNGRY GET THEM POINTS AND DESTROY THE REST OF THE FIELD
charles_leclerc: okay :)
yourusername: good boy
pierregasly: never say that in public again
maxverstappen1: is this why he's blushing so much in the press conference?
charles_leclerc: NO. NO REASON
yourusername: you sure?
charles_leclerc: i am the unluckiest driver ever and am screwed over at every turn sue me if i like a lil praise
user52: charles is so real for that i also want y/n to tell me i'm doing a good job
alexalbon: enough time has passed. @yourusername can lily get some extra tickets for the eras tour
yourusername: of course. anything for my new bestie
lilymunhe: thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu. charles you have amazing taste
charles_leclerc: i know :)
yourusername: i mean i got you, so who's the real winner here?
yourusername
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liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,667,982 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & taylorswift
yourusername: my leg of the eras tour has come to an end :( this was such an insane opportunity, thank you so much taylor xx but this also means i can go annoy charlie until he has to go back to work !!
one last nonsense outro:
i met this lovely boy named charlie,
he races round the world for ferrari,
giving it to me everyday like ari
view all comments
user53: i think y/n might actually be winning in life
user54: is she referencing everyday by ariana grande which is literally just a song about having constant sex?
yourusername: yes and what about it? f1 drivers have great stamina
arthurleclerc: DELETE ASAP
yourusername: no can do baby leclerc
user55: fave outro for real
charles_leclerc: i am blushing !!
pierregasly: she just told millions of people all you do is fuck and now you're blushing ???
yourusername: i don't think mr doggy emoji is talking right now
charles_leclerc: at least y/n did it in an artful way
pierregasly: believe me i know YOU WON'T STOP SINGING IT DOWN THE PHONE YOU MENACE
yourusername: you sing my songs :) ?
carlossainz55: ALL THE TIME
yourusername: i don't like your tone mr 🤨
charles_leclerc: i am just showing my love :(
yourusername: @pierregasly @carlossainz55 you made him sad APOLOGIZE IMMEDIATELY
pierregasly: sorry?
carlossainz55: sorry i guess?
charles_leclerc: thank you :) i shall continue to sing to my heart's content
yourusername: good.
taylorswift: you were amazing !! i'll see you soon my love xx
yourusername: i'm hearing double date ??
taylorswift: i'm sure that can be arranged
charles_leclerc: OMG
user56: charles and travis are really the top tier himbo bfs and i love them for that
fin.
note: i really loved writing this so i hope this was everything you imagined and more!! i'm just getting into sabrina's music but i was a girl meets world stan so... i hope i did the nonsense outro justice xxx
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc instagram au#charles leclerc instagram edit#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc fanfic
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IM SO PISSED OFF FOREVER
preemptively saying that any school thing that needs me to wake up at 7:00 am on a sunday is fucking stupid
#sorry its hater time im especially in a bad mood since im tired DFGHDJ BUT GRARGHHH#this fucking school man. FDGHDJD#maybe its bc im someone whos been depression and anxiety riddled for god knows how long as a teen but the talks rn is kind of funny to me#DFGHD#bc girl these feel so hollow .... to me at least ..... if i heard this back then too i wouldve rolled my eyes .....#idk maybe this does help someone im just a big hater rn orz orz orz#sunnysiderambles#edit: ok another thing everytime the advice for not getting stis is abstinence i immediately stop listening to the advice afterwards DFGHDJ#I GUESS THIS IS A CATHOLIC UNI WHAT DID I EXPECT But also shut the fuck up never soeak againnn FDSGDHJ#i feel like im going insane
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The House of Sin. (part 1)
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Rating: 18+ MDNI. You read at your own risk.
Pairing: Father Charlie Mayhew x housekeeper!fem!reader
Summary: Your very religious family decides to preserve you from the evil of the world by entrusting you to Father Charlie as his housekeeper. You’re welcome in the House of Sin.
TW (for this part): NSFW. SMUT. blasphemy; mentions and references to catholic themes (some of them are prob inaccurate sorry); reader is very religious (but not innocent); mentions of blood; graphic description of self-inflicted flagellation; masturbation; voyeurism; swearing.
a/n: English is not my first language, so please be kind bc this took me so long to translate (lol), if you wanna be added to the tag-list for the next part lemme know with a comment pls
Enjoy xx
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Father Charlie Mayhew had always been faithful and devoted to the promises he made before God when he decided to please Him for the rest of his earthly life, and with the same devotion he always made an effort to spread love for God within his parish.
In his whole life, he never felt the slightest desire to act in opposition to the Lord's word, he never succumbed to temptation, and his spirit never entertained the idea of sinning.
He was the perfect servant, the best guide for his parish, and for the faithful whom the Lord entrusted to him.
Or at least that was what everyone believed about him, including your parents, who thought that offering you the position of Father Charlie’s housekeeper would be the best way to protect you from the vices and dangers of the outside world.
Your father was a strict and religious man who raised you with rules and discipline, so you accepted his decisions without question.
Father Charlie knew your family well and recognized your parents' honesty and devotion, so he had high expectations for you, and you would’ve met all of them.
The initial period of living together at his house was quite peaceful, and being with him felt comfortable from the very first day. You spent your days peacefully working for him, cleaning his house and the church, doing laundry, and preparing lunch and dinner. Nevertheless, you always found a moment for prayer. You shared everything with him and you were grateful and respectful at the point you considered him a master despite his young age.
You recognized your parents' admiration for him, and you shared it too because he was a decent man who cared for all his faithful and his mission as God's servant. He was charismatic, persuasive, and seemingly flawless. To be honest, his personality intrigued you. You had to admit that sometimes you found him charming, but those were just fleeting thoughts that you quickly pushed aside— till tonight.
It’s late at night; all the lights are off, and Father Charlie has retired to his room about an hour ago.
You’ve just finished washing the dishes and are getting ready for the night. As you prepare to head to the room he had assigned to you when you first arrived, a flicker of light and subtle noise from his door catch your attention as you walk through the hallway.
At first, you think it’s just a perception, but as your feet slow down until they stop in the hallway, you realize your ears are not wrong.
Driven by curiosity you approach the door slowly, trying not to make a sound as you peek through the half-closed door to see out what is happening inside his room. But, you know, sometimes curiosity can kill.
You freeze. Your jaw drops, and your eyes widen as they look straight at the scene being etched in your memory.
Father Charlie sits at the edge of the bed, fully exposed to your gaze, the soft light casting shadows on his bare skin. His back is turned to the painting of Jesus Christ hanging on the wall, a watchful presence above him from which he is trying to hide himself.
He’s panting. He’s completely naked. With one hand around his cock.
His eyes are closed and his slightly parted lips release soft moans of pleasure, the rhythm of his breath filling the quiet room. A sheen of sweat glistens on his naked body as he keeps moving his left hand at a rapid pace, trying to set himself free from the lustful thoughts that had taken over his body as soon as possible.
Your breath breaks.
You can’t believe it. Father Charlie has succumbed to the desire of the flesh, his soul becoming stained by a sin he should never have committed. Not him. Not a priest like him.
And without knowing, he‘s pulling you into the Devil’s claws with him.
Because no matter how shocked you are, and no matter how hard you’re mentally cursing yourself for being overcome by curiosity, your eyes are glued to his magnificent body and cannot tear themselves away from it.
You are expected to go, but you can't. You don't want to.
For the first time in your whole yet short life, you hear it. That voice. The voice of temptation.
You continue to stare at him with bated breath, wishing that show will never end.
"Ah, fuck..." he groans and you shudder.
A shiver goes straight to your core, and you immediately feel an urge to clench your thighs together to hold back an unusual tickle that you had never experienced so strongly before.
However, it is not sufficient.
Forgive me, Father… you think. Your cheeks redden with shame as the last bit of reason fades away from you at that precise moment your right hand goes straight under the cloth of your sundress, and just as if it has been guided by a dark and sinister force it sneaks between your legs, right in your cotton panties.
For I have sinned.
You aren’t used to touching yourself, and even if you had done it on rare occasions you'd never imagined doing it like this— secretly watching your priest as he does the same thing.
Soon you realize that something inside you is changing rapidly. It‘s just a tiny spark, but it can set your whole body on fire in no time.
And it’s all his fault.
Your fingertips slide between your already-soaked folds, coating in juices that flow out of you like a river, and then you start teasing yourself shamefully, trying to focus on the scene in front of you to avoid those pitiful and lonely voices that keep whispering to you to stop.
“Yes…” he licks his lower lip and for a brief moment you imagine how good, how pleasant it could be the feeling of his wet tongue on your skin, exactly where your hand is. It’s so, so wrong and you know it, but you can’t control yourself. It’s overwhelming.
His nudity contrasts sharply with the solemnity of the image behind him. He looks so vulnerable, so…
“So good…” he says between moans. You want to know what he’s thinking, what kind of images are guiding his imagination— if you’re part of them too.
His forearm anchors on the mattress to balance himself, and his hips buck against his hand to gain more friction.
“Oh, God…” his broad chest is heaving with every breath that escapes his lungs as you try your best to swallow every squeak, careful not to get caught right there.
Sweat covers his forehead, small drops sliding down his ecstatic face and neck, igniting your deepest fantasies while your fingertips rub at your clit in circular motions, mimicking the pace at which he’s stroking his length.
You can’t help but look at it. Thick and veiny, the tip red and leaking with precum, your pussy throbs around nothing at the mere idea of putting his whole girth in your virgin mouth and knowing how good it could taste.
The man bites his lips and you do it too in reflection.
You are a mess. Your trembling thighs are soaked by the juices dripping from your aching pussy as you frantically touch yourself. Your entire being lies completely under the tight grip of the Devil, ensnared in a web of darkness that seeks to control every thought, feeling, and action.
His strokes become erratic, and his eyebrows knit together in a mixture of pain and bliss. He is close… and in such a short time you are too. Your teeth bite your lower lip until it bleeds, in a desperate attempt to hold back a whine. But you don't stop. You will not do it until he will too.
All of a sudden, his hand stops. A guttural sound of satisfaction slips past his throat reaching your ears as he throws his head back and the orgasm washes over him.
The tight knot in your belly snaps and thousands of shocks invade your body from head to toe. Your vision goes blurry, your mind goes fuzzy and your knees get weak like jelly.
You’ve just reached the peak without even knowing it.
Thick ropes of his white seed spill from his throbbing cock, falling right on his palm and stomach.
Your mouth waters at the sight, you can swear that if only it had been possible you’d walk into that damn room and kneel in between his huge thighs just to lick him clean and suck the soul out of him, making him cum again and again and again.
For God’s sake, those thoughts will send you straight to hell!
Silence takes his moans’ place, and his eyes open slightly as his breathing searches for a more regular pace, just like yours.
You pull out your hand from your soaked panties. A wave of post-orgasmic sense of guilt crashes over you. You have just sinned. Right now is time to go to your room and get some rest, forgetting what have just happened and never thinking again about it, and yet your eyes and your feet are stuck right here, quivering for his next moves.
Everything has been so tempting and your body wants more.
He suddenly gets up from the mattress and makes his way towards the antique dresser next to the bed. A bowl full of water is on top of it, and he quickly dips both his hands inside of it to his wrists, washing away every sign of the sinful act he had just committed—unaware it’s happened in front of you.
From that spot, his body is perfectly exposed to your gaze, and your mind takes advantage of this to explore new, undiscovered places.
He‘s tall, radiant, and huge. He looks like a classical statue. His broad chest and chiseled abs seem to be sculpted in marble, just like his thick thighs and the strong and muscular arms he usually hides under the vestments.
He’s handsome.
Only the Lord knows what those arms are capable of, how those big and veiny hands would be able to touch and grab a woman’s body- your body. How good his mouth would be able to kiss you, bite you, lick you, satisfying the most private parts of you like no one ever did. If only he didn’t have to respect the vows of celibacy and obedience... if only he didn't choose to refuse lust and resist temptation for the rest of his life…
He wipes his hands with a clean towel near the basin, heavy breathing releasing from his lungs as if he wants to get rid of that slamming weight on his shoulders. The weight of the mortal sin he has just given into, the reason why he deserves to be punished— and maybe you deserve it too.
You see him going through the drawer and picking something before he lifts the wooden kneeler to the side. And when he approaches the bed again, you recognize the scourge in his hand.
Your heartbeat down faster as soon as you realize what’s going to happen. Father Charlie places the kneeler in front of the bed, exactly where he was before, and turnes his back to you, revealing his broad shoulders and his back previously tortured by the hits he self-inflicted with the tool he’s now placing on the sheets.
A bunch of shivers flood your body from head to toe, trepassing your spine. You see the still-opened wounds and cuts on his pale skin, the clear signs of every time he sinned and begged for forgiveness.
He kneels and firmly takes the scourge in his right hand. Seven cords, seven barbs for the seven deadly sins, and seven virtues.
The mortification of the flesh.
It‘s the only way to deaden his sinful nature and bring back his focus to the only thing he pledged to honour even after his bodily death.
He rests his elbows on the board, with his back straight as he looks at the white wall in front of him, his eyes filled with certainty and confidence.
He stands right there unshaken, keeping you on edge for his next move before his lips parts and he speaks.
"Merciful Lord, I come before You seeking forgiveness and healing" with a rapid flick of his hand he whips himself violently, making you gasp in shock. You hear him holding his breath, trying his best not to cry and scream from pain, and then he spakes again.
"f-for the sin of lust that… dwells within me." another lash, another flinch from you. Cords are already leaving marks and bruises, you can feel how much they sting on his skin and on his previous wounds as the sharp edges sink on his back mercilessly.
"I confess m-my weakness in giving in to… impure desires" his stomach jolts in pain, and his dilated pupils stare blankly at the painting on the wall as his lips tremble with each syllable "and… indulging in lustful t-thoughts and actions t-that offend… You."
A lot of blood starts gushing out from his wounds, staining the cords with a bright red color.
You cover your mouth in shock. You can see the pained look on his face, pleasure has completely abandoned his now-suffering body that‘s writhing at the feeling of those rusty barbs tearing his flesh apart at every whipping, painting the cold floor with the spatters of his own blood.
Father Charlie is asking for forgiveness, pleading the Lord to save him and have mercy on his damned soul, because he is aware of the burden on his shoulders and he wanted to get rid of it as soon as possible.
And the only way to regain his purity is through suffering, through that physical pain that can purify both his body and soul, leaving him weak and miserable like a dazed sailor who lost his compass and cannot find the horizon.
"Purify my heart" he barely mutters, too exhausted "renew my mind" his forearms lost their grip on the rubbed wood of the kneeler forcing him to cling to it as strength slowly leaves his body. You watch him with an alarmed look on your face, worried about his state "and sanctify my body as Your temple."
A final statement spoken with a broken voice before Father Charlie immediately collapses on the wooden structure, visibly in a worn out state. Spurting blood stains his bare back, his eyelids squeeze trying to kill the pain of that one last whip that completely slashed his flesh.
You accidentally step back with your left foot, producing a nearly undetectable noise that forces you to lean your hand against the wall to keep balance in an attempt not to get caught. Too late.
Father Charlie turns around quickly, towards the door he previously left slightly ajar. His gloomy eyes meet yours even if shrouded in darkness. Your heart stops in your chest, becoming like a stone falling into a bottomless pit.
Shit.
a/n: part 2?
#father charlie smut#father charlie x reader#father charlie mayhew#drabble#smut#one shot#love#blurb#fluff#angst#father charlie mayhew x reader#father charlie grotesquerie#grotesquerie#nicholas chavez smut#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas alexander chavez smut#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x reader#imagine#nicholas alexander chavez imagine#nicholas chavez one shot#father charlie mayhew one shot#monsters#cooper koch
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my father told me he read it, but he hasn't read it. that's okay. my friends keep picking the words out of my throat.
someone once told me that the more trigger warnings that go on a book, the better it is. i didn't mean to write something with so many conditional phrases - i was writing about what i felt while being a human. sometimes you are a person and sometimes you are a statistic. sometimes it is falling upwards and sometimes it's sliding back down again.
my father tells me that it will be difficult to get people to read it. i didn't like the idea of a singular genre. i'm not going to lie to you - it is actually a difficult book to get through. i change the rules in it. it's not poetry or prose explicitly. it's neither false nor reality. i give you the tools to "solve" the book, but i let you do the thinking. my father says people don't care to think. i don't know about that - i think we just, like, enjoy reading.
the thing is - i was tired of stories about survival where someone with depression goes to therapy and wakes up okay. i didn't live like that. i was tired of books about violence, where the gore of what i experience was splashed in glitter to lick off the page. like, i was a person, you know? i had a life and a job and a family. and in books, i watched my story get ripped up so people could explore the viscera of my body. so they could feel good. my brother once called it inspiration pornography. we had walked out of a suicide-prevention seminar, both of us disgusted while the increasingly-elated presenter kept listing methods-of. i remember the look on my brother's face. like i would tear that man apart given the right time and place.
my father says that kids these days. he warns me against writing about things that are too-serious. he says that they don't want it. i don't listen. he does make me take out a scene from the book where i go to church after having sex with a woman. it used to be the 7th scene in the book. i don't think he's read further than that, it rocked him too hard to continue.
it's a book about being queer. it's a book about being raised catholic. it doesn't have monsterfucking, i'm sorry. it's just about, like.
at some point you have to choose to stay here. and then you do have to stay here, which takes practice. this is about forming the habit. this is about what happens after you've already started doing the work. because, like. you keep going. you have to. and it's like. very imperfect.
i should make a post on instagram. i should make this announcement less bittersweet. but like -- i'm giving it you, specifically, because i think you know why i had to write it. you and me. this little community.
body's a bad monster. here's the link if you're interested in ordering.
#i will never shut up about this#by the way . this is the book that u are trying to get me to eat#also available on other links!! barnes and noble and s&S#also btw i drew the cover :) they asked me to lol#btw this isn't self-published. this is like. book deal thru simon and schuster
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french revolution dashboard simulator
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🐀 ami-du-peuple Follow
uh actually man has the right to deal with his oppressors by devouring their beating hearts. hope this helps.
🎩 departicle Follow
Hold up. Okay. Actually, fuck this. This sort of violent rhetoric should not be tolerated on here. Do you seriously think this sort of thing is going to make the nobility give you more rights???? You must be out of your minds! Reported.
🧵 seamstressproud Follow
reblog to devour this guy's beating heart
#username checks out lmao #politics #everybody point and laugh #common adp w
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organt-deactivated06151792
update: new canto out now!!! go check it out 😈😏🥀 (remember don't like don't read <3)
📜 sacredhostreceipts Follow
@centuriesandskies this you?? not such a great look for a convention rep ngl
🌄 centuriesandskies Follow
listen. I wrote this a long time ago, before I went into serious politics. the account is deactivated for a reason.
I was twenty. I did poorly. I can do better.
#sj.txt #if this is the worst dirt you can dig up on me #i'm way less corrupt than half the people in the convention these days #at least i'm not doing fucking. embezzlement. #also sacredhostreceipts if you're who i think you are #don't you have better things to do rn?
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🌎 landscape-showdown Follow
🌎 landscape-showdown Follow
why the fuck is everyone tagging this with french??? political figures?
#what the hell is going on over there #also maybe cool it with the death threats #I don't want this blog to get taken down #what's a girondin #is this some joke I'm not french enough to understand #showdown update
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⛪ progressivepriest Follow
Unpopular opinion but why is everyone so up in arms about the new Civil Oath? Literally all it's asking is for you to promise not to commit treason just because the Pope tells you to? I can see where people are coming from with the whole violation-of-religion deal, but can you blame the Assembly for trying to make sure the people aren't forcibly subjugated by the wealth of the nobility?
faith-first-alwaysdeactivated03011791
Sounds like something a heretic would say. To betray the Pope and king is to betray the will of God and your eternal soul! You should pray for forgiveness and pledge loyalty to the monarchy or have fun burning in hell. Sorry not sorry.
⛪ progressivepriest Follow
L + ratio + iirc the Bible says "it is easier for a rope to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven" (Matthew 19:24)
🎻 lacarmagn01e Follow
occasional based catholic moment, go off OP!
🌊 sea-of-revolution Follow
looked the faith-first-always guy's blog, he's like a massive anti-huguenot too 🙄 why is it always the prot-exclusive radical catholics smh
🌊 sea-of-revolution Follow
LMAOOOOO HE DEACTIVATED
#religion tag #percs fuck off #anyways op makes a valid point #reblog #percs dni
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🛌 virtuous-bedtime Follow
she committee on my safety til I can't go public
🍊 springtimeofgovernment Follow
I don't understand the joke, can someone explain please?? 🙂 Thank you!
🧵 seamstressproud Follow
is that fucking MAXIMILIEN ROBESPIERRE?!!?!?!?
🛌 virtuous-bedtime Follow
oh my god citizen robespierre I'm so sorry this was not meant to break containment lol I didn't even know you were on this site please forget you saw this
#this is the most embarassing moment of my life #literally sobbing rn #the original post is /j i prommy #i cannot be known as the citizen who had to explain this to the government
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🪓 indulgentsfuckoff Follow
fabre d'eglantine is NOT your poor little meow meow citizens he literally falsified decrees from the national convention and embezzled money to line his own pockets. I don't care how uwu babygirl you think he is he is a CRIMINAL who should be ARRESTED
💛 i-give-people-bread Follow
🥖🍞🥐
#baguette #loaf #croissant #i-give-people-bread #indulgentsfuckoff #silly
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🧱 comic-sans-culotte Follow
fucking fed up with the constant threat of the swiss guard, I think it's time we got some gunpowder and weapons and took things into our own hands yknow what I'm saying
🧱 comic-sans-culotte Follow
I'm no longer joking about this btw
🧱 comic-sans-culotte Follow
update:
hopital
🧱 comic-sans-culotte Follow
ok bc I've gotten like 50 asks about this: I am not injured and I am not in need of medical care. the punchline was that we stormed the fucking hotel des invalides to get guns and powder. didn't want to clarify the joke before now for security reasons but everyone knows about that and the bastille thing by now. please direct your money to people who actually need it.
#shouldve clarified the last post was /j #however I assumed yall knew this joke already #anyways #revolution #personal #500 #1k
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🌾 nopain-nograin Follow
got so high at the festivial 2day i thnk i saw hte suapreme being
#robespiere speech was prboably 🔥 #unforntuately i camt rember any of it #grainposting #oipum ehre is somtehing else thes days #memes
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🎨 jldavid-real-moved Follow
incredible speech from @springtimeofgovernment today at the jacobin club. nobody should be permitted to use their positions as civic leaders to commit crimes against the people, even under the guise of revolutionary fervor. if it comes to it, I too will drink the hemlock with him. for france. 🤝🤝
🍊 springtimeofgovernment Follow
Thanks for your support, @jldavid-real
The situation over here is deteriorating really quickly, the representatives are getting violent and abandoning due process entirely. Anything you can do to stand with us now would be very appreciated. You do a lot of great work for the revolution, and I trust you completely.
🍊 springtimeofgovernment Follow
@jldavid-real are you still there? We could really use your help right now.
🌄 centuriesandskies Follow
boosting @springtimeofgovernment here, can confirm he's been injured in a skirmish at the hotel de ville, they're passing summary death sentences without trial, @jldavid-real where is the help you promised us??? the people of paris are our only hope now.
edit: of course he moved blogs. coward.
#sj.txt #disappointed yet unsurprised #marat would be ashamed of you #9 thermidor #update
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🎻 lacarmagn01e Follow
DNI if you support any of these groups/people or their actions: m0narchists, f3uillants, br1ssotins/g1rondins, th3rmidorians, b0napart1sts, h3nri du v3rgier (also goes by c0mte de r0chjacquelin), charl0tte c0rday, or lafay3tte
(h3bertists and dant0nists you're on thin ice. behave.)
#censored so they dont show up in the tags #dni #get your nasty ass ideologies off my page #won't hesitate to block and/or report any violators #pinned
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gracchus-babeufdeactivated05271797
reblog to make the directoire choke to death on their stupid fucking outfits
🌊 sea-of-revolution Follow
hey staff. yeah you. where did this blog go?? notfishgoujon and prairial-95 are gone as well?? cowards too afraid to show your faces lmao especially after the fucking mess the directoire's made of the country. bet you anything that staff are on their fucking payroll too iykwim at least the republic didn't tolerate fucking bribery
#this site's gone to the dogs since thermidor yr 2 #following the trend of the rest of the country tbh #i'll probably get nuked for posting this #if so i'm not making a new account #i'll just make a paleocities or smth #politics tag #reblog #don't play with me ik full well gb didn't delete his blog of his own free will #they also zero note glitched it #just when you think they can't stoop lower
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📕 spectrehauntingeurope Follow
it's been 50 fucking years since gracchus-babeuf (and the other CoE blogs) were deleted without warning and still no response from staff, the govt, or anything. the site's gone through a fuckton of ownership changes and still nothing.
we're working on a bit of a project (some of you might know abt it already), it's gonna be out prob in the next year or so. remember '89. remember '93 and '94. remember '97.
the people will rise again. it's only a matter of time. 🚩
-mod karl
#french revolution#pigeon.txt#shitpost#frev#frevblr#robespierre#saint just#marat#oof this was. a project.#dashboard simulator#funny#meme#unreality#just to be safe
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wouldn't it have been nice to have something to talk about ? he's about to ask whether or not ritsuka would stay by his side and guide him before he stops himself --- something like that might have been a little too clingy and overbearing .
besides , ritsuka was already in the process of admitting all sorts of things .
' the demon lord's faction ... ' okay , he can't help but laugh a little . just a little ! it's like , a sneeze ! a cough ! he covers his mouth and tries to hide away any obvious smile ! ' a-ahem , i don't know , our tastes seem a little ... ' ah , not that he was trying to push the other away , ether ! ' i-i mean , i've only ever really read ... '
u ... uwagh , why was this so embarrassing all of the sudden ?! his heart was pounding ! he was kind of terrified ! as much as he really liked them --- ! ' s-shoujo manga ... but if there was a really cool hero and demon lord and stuff , i'm sure i could get into it , too --- ! '
maybe ? truth be told , it was always difficult for him to enjoy anything without guilt or a wince . saving others was only fun until the saving stopped and turned into destroying ; he'd never see himself in any sort of hero . ' um , i can't really speak for everyone either , but ... it's nice to be able to think that way , right ? ' his transformed shoulders sink a little . ' like ... i don't mind stealing if it's for your sake , senpai , but --- it's still definitely stealing . i don't know if there's any sort of excuse . '
ㅤㅤ" YEAH ! They're super fun ! Though it might be pretty behind the more recent games but maybe after all this, I'd be happy to lend you my collection to try it out ! " It was clear he was quite the enthusiastic gamer.
ㅤㅤRitsuka suddenly, now horrendously reminded of the fact that the way he behaved wasn't entirely far-off. He wasn't into the weird edgy stuff luckily but it didn't make it any less shameful. " Well ... er ... I didn't do any of that but sometimes, I'd wave a stick around and shout out super cringe attack names then ask for guidance from like some kind of goddess or something ... to er -- ... get myself through certain situations. " He did it more times than he could count.
ㅤㅤ" ... Or I would refer to bullies as part of the demon lord's faction ... " Ah, he wanted to die.
ㅤㅤAnyways ! Topic change !
ㅤㅤ" T - that's why it's fun to share these kinds of things with friends and stuff ! At the very least ... we've probably read some of the same mangas. " Maybe they could geek out about that later. " The demon lord, huh ... ? Nowadays a lot of anime and manga focus on the villain side of things ... they can actually be pretty cool and are actually misunderstood. Being a villain doesn't sound so bad sometimes either ... I mean they have their reasons too, right ? "
#*・゚⊰ IC. ⊱#FGO.#yoakenouta#god its okay ritsuka we're all allowed at least one chuuni moment in our lives#sorry the protag burden has to fall to u#usually itd be daisuke's too but shit man when they both agreed in their heads#they'd never have met under normal circumstances#catch me crying in the club#we struggle together yet we'd never have met and bonded together without the struggle#god bless#dai vc i'm pretty sure its a good thing u wnated to b a hero n get rid of bad guys cause whenever i see all that stuff#all the catholic guilt annihilates me and i just sit there thinking 'i'm definitely the bad guy'#maybe it doesnt matter if he wants to join the hero or if he likes them and admires them......... evil be vanquished :( woe
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